3 WAYS TO GAIN RESPECT AS A YOUNG PROFESSIONAL THROUGH INTERNAL AUTHORITY.

Feb 14

THE PROS YOU ADMIRE MOST HAVE INTERNAL AUTHORITY.

Professionalism doesn’t just come by learning a bunch of ways to conduct yourself and habits to live by, it actually comes from INTERNAL AUTHORITY. Internal authority is a power on the outside that comes from self-mastery on the inside.

Here’s the secret no one told you during your professional training: the true masters of your profession are INSIDE OUT. That is, the ways the mentors you admire seem to think, speak, and act on the outside were cultivated through intention and self-discipline on the inside.

To quote the first-century Jewish sage Jesus,

“A Good tree can’t produce bad fruit, and a bad tree can’t produce good fruit. A tree is identified by the kind of fruit it produces. Figs never grow on thornbushes or grapes on bramble bushes.”
Luke 6:43-44

The rabbi is tapping into a super common philosophical motif in the Mediterranean World, where fruit equals ethical virtues (good fruit) or vices (bad fruit). If you are living ethically well, you have good fruit. On the other hand, if you are full of vice, you have bad fruit. Just like a thorn bush doesn’t burst forth with figs, a person who lacks internal authority does not act as a good and wise mentor.

Here is the point (nota bene friends!): if you want to be like the great professionals you admire most on the outside, you need to develop the same strength and goodness inside which they possess inside. Only then will you bear excellent professional fruit. So one more time: professionalism on the outside comes from internal authority on the inside.

HOW DO YOU GAIN INTERNAL AUTHORITY?

In general, you gain authority over something by having gone through it successfully. For example, when you have written several legal documents, had your boss tell you it wasn’t good enough time and again, and then you finally start to turn in acceptable drafts, it is because you have grown enough as a person and a writer to be told you are wrong and do better. You gain authority by self-discipline in the face of adversity. That means every mentor you admire probably went through the same types of struggles.

Here are 3 ways (there are a few more) to fast-track internal authority.

01. IMITATE A MENTOR UNTIL YOU START TO TRANSFORM.

When I was in the first few years of my professional life, I screwed around pretty much all the time. Just being straight. I was a total goofball, and then I would try to act with the appropriate level of seriousness whenever I sensed it was necessary. The problem was, seriousness was necessary WAY MORE than I thought (shocking I know…). As a result, I wasn’t carrying myself in the office, or in my life honestly, with the level of gravitas commensurate to my profession. Then one day something clicked for me— I always told people I wanted to be like my mentor someday… but I had never acted like him a day in my life.

I decided to imitate my mentor. I started to literally mimic the person who inspired me. I did what he did, spoke like he spoke, and even tried to start thinking like he thought.

For example, my natural tendency was to raise my voice in a group of people to show everyone that I was helping someone with something important. This was total ego, but I was about 23. When I watched my mentor, he would do the complete opposite. He would actually lean in and talk softer. In fact, the more important something was to his client, the more he closed off the conversation to anyone and everyone else with his body language and volume. I asked him why he spoke so softly to clients, and he told me it showed them he took their pain and their growth seriously AND that he could always be trusted with confidentiality.

I started to do the same—and I still do— because I realized how much better it felt and served my clients. I wanted them to know I was above all else FOR THEM and CONFIDENTIAL with the issues they had brought to me. What about you? Who is in your orbit who has been a trustworthy guide in your profession, and how could start to move in the world just like them?

02. REALIZE THERE IS NO PROFESSIONAL LIFE AND PERSONAL LIFE… JUST LIFE.

This one is hard, but it is a total game changer. We all like to think that work and home, professional and personal are completely different realms. Actually they are not. There is no professional life and personal life… just life. The way you do anything is the way you do everything, and so you have to learn to be a person you are proud of in the mirror both at work and home.

Think about it:

If people you admire at work could see your weekend, would you be embarrassed?
Are there areas of your life you have compartmentalized from who you SAY you want to be?
Is the crew you are around when you are not at work conducive to your future-self? Or holding you back?

The longer I have served in three professions (pastor, professor, coach) over two decades, the more I believe that all of life is connected and there is no place you go where you can hide from your thoughts, words, and actions. And so, in the words of Epictetus, “decide first who you will be, and then go be it.”

03. ALIGN YOUR IDEALS AND YOUR CONDUCT.

The single-most important way to gain internal authority is to ALIGN YOUR IDEALS AND CONDUCT. If you are not crystal clear on your ideals (your core virtues and values, and a clear vision of your future-self), you will struggle to gain internal authority.

You will simply grow and thrive better as a professional and person with a lucid understanding of who you are, what you are here to do, what values you uphold no matter the cost, and what kind of person you are realizing each and every day.

One more time, here are the ideals you need to know:

Your core virtues
Your core values
A clear vision of your future-self

And here is what you need to do with self-discipline and consistency:

Align your thoughts, words, and actions with the virtues you claim to possess
Align your thoughts, words, and actions with the values you claim to hold
Develop a clear goal of who you are working to become

At Philosopher Kings, we help clients deeply with self-awareness and internal authority through mentorship, coaching, and community. For now, stick around and start asking yourself one simple question:

Am I proud of who I am both in my professional and in my personal life?

If you want a practical way to get started in developing internal authority, check out the Philosopher Kings MEMO, 10 fun and doable pages of reading a month which pairs well with red wine and no small children. Ha!

Here’s to your growth and virtue,

Mark Shaffer

Founder of Philosopher Kings